Thursday, February 4, 2010

The guy wearing a cardboard box in front of H&R Block

A block of ice fell from an airplane landing in Las Vegas and tore a hole in the roof of a nearby garage. If you ask me, ABC is going overboard with its promotions to get people to watch the last season of “Lost.”

City officials in Bristol, Connecticut, banned the Liberty Tax Service from having people stand outside their offices wearing Statue of Liberty costumes. Ironically, they missed the guy wearing a cardboard box in front of H&R Block.

A gun shop owner in Italy is accused of murdering a man, cutting off his head and burning it in a pizza oven. The pizza maker who found it said in olive his life he never sausage a sight and didn’t feel too gouda ‘bout it.

According to a new study, scientists have found a way to allow people in a vegetative state to communicate by having them visualize things and then measuring their brain activity. This could add 20 years to Keith Richards’ career.

A Washington state man has filed an initiative to change the state seal from the image of George Washington to a picture of “a tapeworm dressed in a three-pieced suit attached to the taxpayer's rectum.” Here’s a guy who obviously listens to too much rap music.

Apple co-founder Steve Wozniak says he has a Toyota Prius with an acceleration problem and thinks it’s caused by the vehicle's software. Have you seen the Woz lately? He should be glad any car he’s sitting in can accelerate at all.

After being caught using the word “retard,” White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel committed to signing an online pledge to make the word obsolete. Now someone needs to catch him using the word “whatever.”

In a interview where he was asked about feminism, Rush Limbaugh said, “I love the women's movement especially when I'm walking behind it.” According to the latest ratings, he lost both of the women who still listen to him.

Comcast announced it will change the name of its cable TV, Internet and phone services to XFinity. Now XFinity needs to improve its Xservice or it’s going to have a lot more Xcustomers.

Mildred's Temple Kitchen, a restaurant in Toronto, Canada, is inviting customers to have sex in its bathrooms on Valentine’s Day. Sounds like the perfect plan to get guys in and out of the restrooms a lot faster.

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