Monday, September 21, 2009

Planes on a snake

Two teenage brothers in Australia turned in more than $86,000 they found in a creek while fishing. Being typical fishermen, they told their friends they found $172,000.

A California man charged with throwing thousands of golf balls out his car window in Joshua Tree National Park claims he did it to honor dead golfers. He got caught when park rangers found a mountain lion whacking his golf balls at tourists and pretending to be a Tiger.

Scientists at the Everglades National Park speculate that an African rock python and a Burmese python could mate in the Florida swamp and produce a huge, possibly man-eating hybrid. With the new species expected to reach well over twenty feet long, small airports nearby are cautioning pilots not to accidentally land their planes on a snake.

Former George W. Bush speechwriter Matt Latimer's new book reveals that Bush once said of Jimmy Carter: "If I'm ever eighty-two years old and acting like that have someone put me away." Secret Service agents had to stop a number of people yelling, “Why wait?”

David Hasselhoff’s 17-year-old daughter called paramedics to take him to the hospital because he was drunk, but Hasselhoff says it was just a bad reaction to some medication for an ear infection. The Hoff has invited Pierce Morgan and Sharon Osborne over so he has enough votes to kick his daughter out.

A new book reveals that Barack Obama didn’t like the slogan “Yes we can” when it was first proposed to him during the 2004 Illinois Senate race because he thought it was “childish.” He gave in when Michelle called him a big baby.

In the book "Barack and Michelle: Portrait of an American Marriage," Christopher Andersen say Michelle Obama shot down Hillary Clinton as a potential vice president because she didn’t want her and Bill down the hall in the White House. Especially after the Secret Service said she couldn’t cover the doorknobs to her bedroom with Vaseline.

New York Governor David Paterson says he’ll run in 2010 even though President Obama asked him not to. Obama would rather have someone with a better chance of winning and has narrowed his list down to everyone else in New York except Al Sharpton and the Mets.

President Obama played 18 holes of golf with New York Times columnist Tom Friedman. No one would say who won, but Friedman kept complaining that the course was not flat.

The Emmy Awards did well in the ratings thanks to emcee Neil Patrick Harris. Harris couldn’t wait to rub the ratings in the noses of last year’s emcees who kept referring to him as “Doogie Hoster.”

Rocker Courtney Love allegedly went nuts when someone at a party opened an unlocked bathroom door and saw her on the toilet with her skirt around her ankles. Courtney just hates people seeing her like that without paying for a concert ticket first.

A Huntsville, Ala., defense contractor was the high bidder at $63,000 in an eBay auction for dinner with Sarah and Todd Palin. According to the rules, the dinner will not exceed four hours, no politics will be discussed and the winner must not wear Levis.

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