Libyan leader Muammar Gaddafi has adopted a small Italian village to help with its poor economy and high unemployment. In return, all the Italians have to do is change their favorite exclamation to “Muammar Mia!”
BP claims it has spent $2 billion so far in response to the massive oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. It should have been a lot more but apparently the blow-out protector on BP’s checking account is still working fine.
Authorities at Dulles International Airport arrested a man trying to smuggle more than four pounds of cocaine using powdered soup packets. Security guards got suspicious when the man showed them his really tiny soup spoon.
CBS has joined forces with an Indian company to launch channels in India. New CBS shows for the Indian market include “India’s Next Top Brahma,” “Two and a Half Maharishis” and “How Our Parents Arranged For Me To Meet Your Mother.”
Police in Syracuse charged two vacuum cleaner salesmen with a misdemeanor after they destroyed a mattress during a home demonstration. The men didn’t say what they were doing on the mattress with the vacuum but the housewife was still interested in buying the very special attachment.
An estimated 8,000 cyclists in various stages of undress rode through downtown Portland, Oregon, in the annual World Naked Bike Ride. Injuries were down this year due to pre-ride safety instructions on how to use duct tape to avoid getting caught in the spokes.
An Oklahoma woman set a new world endurance record by wing-walking four hours above San Francisco on a World War II-era biplane. Just like flying on inside an airliner, she managed to survive for four hours by eating bugs.
Elin Nordegren, wife of Tiger Woods, is enrolled at a Florida college taking a psychology course on “human abnormal behavior.” Her professor guaranteed her an A if she brings Tiger in for show-and-tell.
Under a tentative deal reached between Gov. David A. Paterson and legislative leaders, new cigarette taxes in New York will push the price to $10 a pack. This will officially mark the end of the expression, “Can I bum a smoke?”
In World Cup soccer, Portugal defeated North Korea 7-0. Fans back in Portugal celebrated by ducking their heads under their desks.
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